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..then change your life.

Have you ever done anything that made you feel so completely free that it didn't matter what others thought of you, how you looked or what it actually meant?  Have you ever just done something because it felt like the right thing to do, not because you were raised to think so or told you must?  

Once you experience this bliss, your ultimate freedom, you'll trust your instincts to make decisions to improve your life, your happiness and self-esteem.  You need confidence to overcome what holds you back from being yourself, the person of whom you want to take responsibility. 

Free yourself by being yourself

Perhaps if we live nearest to our heart, our truest sense of self, we would find it easier to accept our mistakes because we wholly own them.  When we continue to let others negatively affect our life and choices, we diminish our ability to own our failures or successes because much of what we do is based on opinions, actions and decisions of others.  We let them live our life.

Giving up control shields us from accepting blame for the bad things that happen; it also diminishes our feelings of accomplishment with the good.  This leads to low self-worth and affects our ability to overcome adversity and vision to see past our failings in an effort to find happiness and fulfillment.  We need to be willing to fail, fall, lose then learn.  Once we accept what went wrong, we have the power to improve ourselves, our life.  This is an autonomous right.  This is our right.

It's in the most difficult times in our life we gather great wisdom if we possess the ability to overcome our problems and setbacks.  In learning, we mustn't take too long or waste much of our life wondering how things have become this way.   Life is best lived in action, not reaction.

The sooner we get over the past and work through our problems, the sooner we use our newfound wisdom to gain success. 

How do we do that?

Put it in perspective

Has anyone taken a video of you that later you cringed to see?  It's you, but perhaps you sound different from how you think you sound, look different and just basically seem like someone else.  This is because you're looking at you, instead of out from your perspective.  It's not easy for most of us to look in at ourselves, to find what holds us back.   But, who is more important to assess yourself, than you?  Your opinion matters!  

At first we all want to avoid cringeworthy feelings about the decisions we make, how we behave, how we cope with our mistakes, losses or failures.  We may do as we do, but still not feel confident in our actions.  Why?  Because, underneath, there lies self-doubt.  Fear to claim that person as ourselves through self-analysis.  What if we don't like ourselves?  What if we look bad to others?  What if we were wrong?  What if we are wrong?

But, if we don't find the problems, how can we improve?  

Take back control

Once you face the hard stuff, you feel empowered.  You know your faults and forgive yourself, which makes the scrutiny of others less impactful.  You find positive attributes you never knew you had.

As you improve upon the things that are important to you and accept what you can't change, you become more confident.  You easily recognize the difference between sincere concern or advice from others based on there discontentment about who you are, the way you live, how you dress or what you do that makes you happy and most productive! 

You are more capable of recognizing and correcting your own mistakes as you make them in order to keep your life moving in the right direction. 

Your first steps to individual freedom, acceptance and happiness

Emotions are part of your humanity

Working through difficult aspects of yourself and life brings about numerous emotions.  Accept that in being human you are naturally affected emotionally by fear, pain, jealousy and regret.  Emotional intelligence starts with recognition of such emotion and control, not in complete repression, rather in healthy expression.  It shouldn't consume you or persuade you from seeking success.

With most opportunity there's resistance.  That resistance can beat you down and hold you back.  Or, you can use that resistance to gain strength, wisdom and perseverance to accept every opportunity and all that comes with it. 

Are you a loser?

In seeking success, you will lose - often.  Life is not about one opportunity though.  It’s about a lifetime of opportunities.  What you do following a failure will determine whether you will be "a loser" or a winner who loses sometimes.  If you don't learn how to lose, you will always be in that fateful "loser" category.  You must learn to fall and get back up.  You must learn to lose to succeed.

Some of the hardest lessons to learn aren't when times are difficult.  It's when we have overcome many losses in our life, started to really make some advancement that we are faced with a tremendous, shocking defeat.  We are left thinking every success pales in comparison to such a failure.  We may try to rise above it, but we feel small compared to the momentous life changing event that seemingly destroys our life.

These are those things that happen that can shift a person into a direction for which he may never return.  Such events may cause lifelong anger, bitterness and continued failure.  In fact, odds are, it will.  More than half of us may never be the same after such an event, landing on the side of it being a negative impact in our life.  Some will overcome it and develop coping strategies that they may use to get by, but never really excel past the value of life at the time the event took place.  

Life's a gamble

Play it right and you can't "lose" even when you do.

It's only those great people who develop more from such difficulties to make them stronger, faster, smarter and more valuable.  They develop resilience and naturally gravitate towards higher risk for higher reward.  Yes, upon success following loss, we actually open the door for life at it's fullest.  We experience our moment, our freedom to live as we should.  We experience more love, more life, more opportunity.  In doing so, we will always lose more, lose often and gain invaluable wisdom to gain life’s greatest achievements.  

In some ways, many of us may have only an idealist notion that success is easy for some.  But really, successful people make it look easy because they do more, complain less and accept loss as a reasonable percentage of an appreciable gain.  In other words, everything good has some bad.  Get used to it.  Expect it and overcome it or be a failure.

Wanna live comfortable? Hospital respirators are available on-line...

It's good to be comfortable.  But, it's not "living" to do so.  It’s just a comfortable existence.  Be smart, wise, careful.  But, you must live and experience life.  If your life is on automatic pilot, you have given up control of your happiness.  You must open that door, dance in the rain, sing at a ballgame, run like you are being chased.  Not because we are telling you to, but because your life really does depend on it. 

Once you learn how to be yourself, you'll learn to be that person at home, at work, in relationships.  You'll speak up, be heard, laugh, cry, write, walk.  Not just walk, walk-up, walk-out, walk your way.  Your life will change.  They will notice.  They will listen, read, follow, not because you need them to or because they have to, but because they will want to.  

Those things that makes you different, others will understand and relate.  You'll be surrounded by free thinkers who understand the liberation to live as we should, not just as we are expected. 

If you want life to be about a comfortable existence and care about what others think, give your loved-ones your Living Will, put yourself in a coma and live on a respirator until they pull the plug.  

This is not meant to be disrespectful to those who have had loved ones survive with the aid of a respirator.  But, imagine how people who are truly nearing the end of their life would enjoy even one more opportunity to get up and run, walk and talk, as you have the everyday power to do!  You better believe they would dance in the rain, sing at a ball game and run until the very end!  

If you want to live, start today.  Get up.  Get out.  Go!  Your destiny isn't waiting for you to decide.  Every minute that passes without you experiencing your life as it should be experienced, disappears.  You will never get that time back.  When we say, "Make every minute count.", it's because your life, as it's meant to be lived, has packed the car and is ready to pull away without you, like it or not.  

What are you gonna do?  The engine is running.... 

-OurDMK.com



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