When you married, you were beginning, what was going to be, a great life with a wonderful person.  Now, life has changed and divorce has ripped through your relationship, family and faith. 

Some of you struggled for answers and looked for help through counseling, friends and family to save your marriage.

Some of you prayed alone and turned to your faith as a means to stop the freight train of pain and sadness of a divorce emerged.  

Many felt the conflictions in choosing divorce despite religious laws that discouraged or disallowed it. 

Regardless of the many reasons to feel lost now, you had the courage to accept the end of a faithful union in an effort to improve your life. 

That's where you should begin to find your way to a renewed faith and stronger relationship with God. 

Coping with the confusing time after divorce

As the grief and anger subside, you are left with the complexities that many of us face in times of loss.  Questions of your faith are not uncommon.   

The "Why me?" syndrome sets in and you may wonder why your faith couldn't have presented you with a better solution, or a better marriage.  You may question many things, analyze everything and doubt much of what you formerly believed, chose or wanted.

During this time, many may experience a feeling of failure, much as they would at the end of any long-term commitment.  Marriage, however, is one that has such immense personal attachment, it often causes many of us to lose our normal objectivity and self-assurance.

It's not uncommon analyze failures to avoid making them again.  Following the decision to end a relationship to someone for whom you were committed for a lifetime, opens the door to analyze other long-term commitments.  Your faith may be one of them.   Faith can mirror our life's value, structure and support system. It naturally turns top-of-mind in times of crisis.

Are questions of faith wrong?

To analyze faith, religion or beliefs is not to denounce it, per-se'.  Rather, in our hearts we wish it to be proven a stronger sense of stability in our life. In many times, this will hold true. 

Faith does not guard you from difficult times, bad things or hurtful people.  What it can do is give us the strongest foundation in our life to support rebuilding after disaster.

What questions will help you rebuild?

  • Does it mean you can accept flaws within your religion once you start to tear down the walls through introspection and yet still seek the guidance and stability of your faith in God? 
  • Can this time of reflection and consideration be useful in understanding other faiths, people, beliefs? 
  • Finally, could you start to open your mind and heart for a greater understanding of your life, faith, nature and what your religion means to you? 

The answer to all, is yes.  You not have to give up what has provided a great deal of strength and guidance in your life when questioning it and your decisions.  Instead, find a greater goodness your faith can provide.  

In times of sadness and despair, you may feel religion has failed to provide protection from such times.  In these times, when your beliefs are challenged, know that your faith is still strong, God is still there and your religion is forever part of you, woven within you, providing strength you need to move your life forward. 

It provides the power to overcome what you can't control or change.   Faith provides all of us the ability to forgive others, as well as ourselves, to embrace our true destiny, past true despair. 

Despite obvious answers from your faith in God, religion or community, your faith is there in ways you may not realize, helping you. 

It's there

It's why you read this article.  You didn't read it because your faith is absent.  Your faith to find answers for what you're missing in your life still inspires you.  

You've lost your way, but truly, your faith is forever present, providing you answers you seek to find your way back.

Consider, when the sun sets.  It still warms the earth.  It's there.  It's always there, even when we can't see it.  The earth continues to orbit the sun, yet we feel abandoned in the darkness.  Yet, it's the earth, like our life, that changed direction not the sun, not our faith. 

Even when our world has turned away from the sun.  We may feel cold, but the sun's warmth, provides for us and with it's magnificent power brings us back to the light where we can always be sure it will be seen and felt.

Despite our life changing direction at times, it's our faith - like a force that is forever present, assuring us we will always find our light of day!

Our faith has always been there because we seek it.   

If you seek faith, you have faith. 

Loss is part of living

Our faith in our beliefs, religion & ourselves can overcome any obstacle with patience and understanding.   It starts with a quest  It's this greatness that allows us to accept our humanity and it's imperfections as part of life's cycle. 

Realizing the debts of our humanity is a given. We all lose, fail, hurt.  Without such loss we can not assume the greatest of life's offerings.  

Life comes with death.  We are mortal.  But, like many of our faiths and religions, we believe there is something more, we believe in heaven and hell or some with our fate determined by our actions here on earth.   Between our beginning of life and our end, there are many examples of such mortality and choices that determine our fate and quality of our life here on earth.

In accepting loss as part of our life, we can acknowledge it as a precipitator to a new beginning, an everlasting cycle. Examples in our life, like divorce, suggest when we meet an end, we are offered a beginning.  We have the power to pursue it or let the end consume us.  Allow your faith to provide the inspiration and desire to let go of certain losses and accept others in order to accept the opportunity for a renewed life journey.  

Have faith in yourself

There's always an opportunity to discover a new path or solution in the face of adversity.   Practicing organized religion provides community support and an organized belief system to rely upon for direction.   In it's absence, until you find your new path, believe in yourself and your wisdom to make good choices.   This is the gift of faith that will always be part of you.  This is part of the core of your belief system, faith in oneself.  It's never too late or been too long to rejoice in your faith in God.

If you can't find answers, seek God

Some circumstances can be so destructive to everything in your life that you may not feel the connection to your faith as when times were good.   Recognize your faith within yourself as strengths, courage and determination in order to feel it's power to support you and put you on the path of recovery.  

Upon doing so, you will find a new, closer relationship with God, a stronger commitment to your religion and greater understanding of it's purpose.  



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