Is your life a hot mess?  Life challenges come in all different shapes and sizes.  What can break you one day, may barely affect your life the next.  Much has to do with the amount of anxiety, stress, and additional problems you currently face.

The balance of your physical and emotional health is essential.  But, at the time chaos hits the fan, we are rarely prepared to properly analyze the perfection of our "balanced mind, body and soul".  So, we react, let go and hold on.  It's like a wild ride at an amusement park.  

Is there a right or wrong way to live when life gets this way?

Home

One of the best strategies to follow when your home is a total freakin' mess is to let life happen when it happens.  Don't overstress about little messes.  Instead focus on organization. 

Prioritize

Determine your problem areas such as bills, groceries, meals, laundry, lawn care.  Organize chore lists, plan-ahead with premade meals for the weekdays, do one load of laundry everyday instead of making it a laundry weekend (and we all know how those go).  Make a list for the grocery store to avoid overspending.  Get your bills on autopay or set up a budget on your home computer with easy pay options by app or web so that you spend less money and time writing checks and/or calling-in last minute payments.

Organize

There are ways to keep your life in order, even when the house and kids may be a complete mess.  It's important to focus away from the mess on the counters, unmade beds or housecleaning. 

Instead, keep up with things that can get away from you (e.g., A full sink of dishes leads to stress at mealtime.  Keep this chore up, while you may ignore chores like making beds, dusting, or floor care.  These chores won't affect family time or schedules.).  

Tackle it together

At the end of the week, survey what needs attention and attack.  Have the kids help with a once over cleaning on the weekend.   Set a goal of no more than 2 hours.  This will encourage everyone to participate and get their chores done efficiently so that the weekend is spent having fun rather than recovering from the week.   A specified and limited time also helps you schedule other commitments around keeping your home life together.  Isn't that what we work so hard to achieve?

Self

When things start to get away from you at work, home, and/or with family you need to be the one who knows when to say "when".  This is especially important as a single person because you are less likely to have someone around who will recognize the signs of stress, anxiety, or depression.  It is much more difficult to notice changes in yourself, appearance and behavior like a spouse might.

Life gets harder following divorce, before better

No matter how difficult or seemingly simple your problems may be, the combination can cause everyday minor issues to eventually lead to overload.  You may find yourself overreacting, unable to find solutions or unable to block such issues from interfering with your emotional well-being.

It may be difficult to cope as you normally would with your toddlers' tantrums, preteen's moodiness or teenager's attitude.  It may seem like your divorce only made your family situation harder.  And while it may be absolutely overwhelming for all of you initially, you'll build a new family dynamic that has the potential to bring you closer together.  It takes patience, dedication, and hard work. 

Take care of yourself

Sometimes the most important and hardest work to stick with is taking care of "you".  Remember, you are at the center of your family unit.  If you aren't healthy, happy, and forward thinking, your family and home will be among the first to suffer.  

Offset negative emotions to cope with your stress.   Initiate healthy activities that provide an outlet for your problems.   Include aerobics, yoga, or walking.  Almost immediately you'll find it easier to cope with your divorce and everyday life battles.

Talk to a doctor

If you still feel overloaded, stressed-out, or low energy after a reasonable period, go into a family doctor. 

Stress, anxiety, and depression can cause physical symptoms

Difficult, life-changing situations like divorce have the power to affect your physical health.  

Family drama and stressful situations may cause low energy, pain, or sleeplessness.  This may lead to more anxiety and depression.   Left untreated, either may cycle back to family problems and stress.   

Your physical well-being causes your situation to worsen which continues to affect your physical well-being and so-on.    Sometimes something as simple as a low-dose prescription and/or therapy can make all the difference. 

Medical conditions may worsen

Demanding situations may also exacerbate unknown or previously managed conditions that may need immediate attention.  Some common examples: diabetes, high blood pressure, anxiety/depression, thyroid disorders, or other auto-immune disorders.  

Keep your health network informed

Managing medical conditions can make coping with everyday problems difficult and vice versa.  Consider sharing details of your stress load at- home and work with your doctor and share medical conditions with your therapist or counselor.   This ensures a more complete picture of your health & wellness for practitioners to consider.

Get started today

Follow your doctor's advice, get diagnostic testing, as needed, and consider a prescription or counseling, if recommended.  Continue to eat right, get plenty of sleep and drink more water on any given day than soft drinks, coffee, or energy drinks.   Unless your doctor advises otherwise, keep exercising to include aerobics, weight training and stress relieving/stretching activity like Pilates® or yoga.

-OurDMK.com

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