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DMK Hubby and Wifey University Quote: "By all means marry.  If you get a good wife you'll be happy.  If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher." -Socrates

DMK Happy Wife Tip: Your wife may not understand the stress and pressure you're under at work. She wants you to help around the house the minute you walk in the door. You want to help, but if you don't help right away she gets upset.

Talk with your wife at a non-stressful, separate time from when she asks for your help. Let her know that you understand how stressful her day is also and that she manages stress in a different way than you do. You would be more productive with a list of honey-dos in advance.

Ask if daily to-dos could routinely be assigned to you so that you can know what to expect when you get home everyday.  That way you would be able to get some things done later at night for the next day so that you can take some time when arriving home to destress.  

Don't be afraid to share the details of what you're going through at work, with your wife. Encourage her to talk with you about her situation too. Sometimes each spouse has a general idea of each other's problems, but until each knows the specifics, the burdens can be overwhelming and cause a marital divide.

Ask your wife for help when you need it.  It's not uncommon for the breadwinner to feel as if he/she is caught between two very demanding situations, especially when his/her spouse also works and needs more help around the house. There may be many things that your spouse would be better to do that would give you more time to do some things that are better suited to your skills and expertise. Just ask.

Offer to help when she doesn't ask. If your spouse has been with kids for 10 hours or working then comes home to get dinner started along with other household chores, she may feel slighted if you don't jump right in to help. This may be why she asks for help the minute you walk in the door. The more you offer or get started on something that needs to be done, the less she'll ask. 


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